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Have you ever had a moment when doing something good made you feel deeply connected to the world? But simultaneously, it made you mad about the system and some people.
It was one of the days for me yesterday. And also for my husband.
I never publicize our acts of helping others because I was raised with a Turkish saying that profoundly resonates with me: “Bir elin verdiğini diğer el görmesin.” This translates to, “Let one hand not see what the other hand gives,” signifying the value of doing good deeds discreetly, without seeking recognition or praise.
But today, I feel a change within me. I need to share, express my emotions, and open my heart intensely…
I met a family who needed help yesterday. The mom was sick and couldn’t stand well, and she had three kids to look after, with no car to get around. Her little girl, trying to be vital for her mom, touched my heart deeply. Insanely deeply.
We drove them to a food pantry, where people who don’t have enough can get food for free. Some good people donate food pantries, and others in need get it to feed their kids. I am explaining as I tell a little kid maybe someone read this and do shopping for their local food pantry.
The ride there was quiet, but the little girl was so happy and excited to ride in a car and go shopping; the air was filled with shy thankfulness and the heavy reality of their situation.
The food pantry was like a treasure trove to the little girl. She ran around, picking out vegetables and fruits with the biggest smile. It was as if she was in Disneyland, choosing each item with wonder and excitement.
“Mom, I got the biggest one, I got the most biggest one!” she exclaimed, holding a large cabbage like it was the best prize.
She was talking about a cabbage. I want to repeat. A cabbage!
It hit me hard to see her find joy in something as simple as picking food, especially when I think many kids might overlook such simple pleasures for expensive toys or trendy treats.
After helping them with their groceries, we drove them back home.
While heading back home, my husband and I couldn’t hold back our tears. The rain was pouring like crazy; it was cold and dark.
I asked my husband, “Did you see the flip-flops?”
He said nothing because he could not.
The radio played “Losing My Religion” by REM, which just fit the mood perfectly.
We cried, not out loud, but with a kind of silent sob that shakes you deeply.
This whole experience made me realize something important. There’s a real power in helping others, not for thanks or a pat on the back, but just because it’s the right thing to do. It’s about feeling a deep connection to someone else’s life.
I’m writing this to ask some tough questions today. If you see yourself in some of the parts that I listed below, please ask yourself this question “What’s wrong with me?”
- If you don’t reach out to help your friend or neighbor who’s desperately looking for a job, and you even did not ask, “How can I help you?” Or you can do something and are doing nothing, not even giving your time to help and make a difference.
- If you sleep happily in your warm bed while someone in your neighborhood goes hungry.
- The elderly lady next door who struggles to carry something, or if you’ve never offered a ride to someone who walks miles to work every day in your community.
- If you haven’t checked on the single parent down the street to ask if they’re okay.
- If you’ve never considered the children in your area who might need school supplies they can’t afford or if you’ve ignored the opportunity to volunteer at a local shelter or food bank.
- If you’re not bothered by the litter in your local park but haven’t spent even a moment to help clean it up, or if you’ve never participated in a community event to improve your neighborhood.
- If you overlook the stray animals in your area, never think about providing food or a safe shelter.
- If you’ve never taken a moment to speak against injustices and stand up for what’s right in your community.
- If you’ve never lent an ear to someone grieving or offered a comforting word to those going through tough times.
- If you’ve never shared your knowledge or skills with others who could benefit from them or haven’t considered how your actions or inactions contribute to the more significant societal issues at hand.
- If you always shop from big brands instead of your local small businesses.
- If you fail to offer an opportunity to those desperately seeking one.
- If you’re nice and peaceful in public but hold onto negative feelings and hate secretly.
I can make this longer. But I will not. You know what you are capable or not.
Being a slacktivist is the easy path; the real challenge lies in being an activist. However, by activism, I don’t mean engaging in extreme acts, like getting naked or running through the streets. You can be calm, kind, and quietly impactful by helping others without saying much.
Life’s hectic for everyone. But if we can’t find it to lend a hand or a listening ear, it might be time to stop and think about why that is.
This writing isn’t for a call to action. It’s a nudge to look inside and ask ourselves if we can give more love, empathy, and kindness. Because these things truly make the world go round.
If any items on the list resonate with you or reflect your actions, it’s a sign to make some changes in your life.
Trust me, you will feel amazing when you share love, when support someone, or give help to a person in need of something that you already have.
